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Big Brother 13 Episode 14 8/7/11 Recap – Entitled Bullies

August 8th, 2011 · No Comments

Courtesy of Media Fiends

So the show picks up after Brendon’s eviction and we hear everyone’s thoughts about it to the camera. Jordan said she is glad she’s still there but she feels bad that Brendon is gone because she thinks Blechel is the reason she is still there. She knows Blechel would never BD her.

Daniele told Brendon to have fun watching Rachel from home. She doesn’t feel bad at all and is ready to get Rachel out the door next.

Rachel whined that Daniele got rid of Brendon to make her hurt. Can this girl be any more pathetic? Daniele is all about the game here, idiot. Nothing personal about her moves whatsoever. I know she has a lot of haters out there and see things about Daniele that just aren’t there. It’s so not personal. She was aligned with Blechel. Blechel double crossed her. Blechel are a huge competition threat. So you know these people are after you and they win stuff. Of course they would be your targets. But let’s go back to Rachel’s pity party. She says Daniele has started a war [Um, no. You did be betraying her.] and she will do anything she can to make sure Daniele leaves.

Jeff is very happy Jordan is safe but a Vet left so that means his target gets bigger. He is going to put the target on a Newbie.

Lawon ranted something about it was time for someone strong to get out and show we are there to play. What? He is so confusing.

Kalia is so happy to win HoH and she knew Daniele was nervous. She thinks she has proven to Daniele now that she is here to play.

Daniele said she is proud of her protégé and is definitely not regretting turning on her old alliance now.

Rachel cried that Kalia was the worst person to win HoH. They laughed about getting Brendon out and have been mean to her all week. I think the girl truly sees things that way when it couldn’t be further from the truth. The only mean girl has been her.

Jeff also states the obvious that the person he least wanted to win HoH, did.

Then we go to Porsche immediately apologizing to Jeff after the HoH about putting him in the game. Why did BB pick such complete and utter pussies for this season? WTF does Jeff need an apology? He’s not a floater, right? He’s a competitor! He yells it all the time. So shouldn’t he step up to win the HoH and not just float into the win? I know he’s all tough and everything and likes to yell and rant and rave. He tells us over and over how cool and awesome he is and no one can beat him. So what should it matter if Porsche put him in it because he is the bestest at everything in the world. He’s so pathetic. I guess it’s because he’s just so used to the show giving him what he wants he thinks everything should be handed to him. So everyone else needs to play and shouldn’t float but it’s OK for him. Porsche tells us that it was an honest mistake but if the HoH doesn’t put her up now because of it, it’s kind of a win. You know, this girl is slowly winning me over every week. Would we be BFFs? No. The girl tells things how she sees it and she isn’t hiding behind anything. I am liking it.

Then we see the typical Storage Room celebration after the HoH win. I am getting real tired of this. It’s on par with, “Who wants to see my HoH rooooommm?” Can’t this be REAL and just film what happens and not set up the shots each week? It’s annoying. Kalia celebrated alone and said nobody better say she’s not there to play or deserves to be there. Oh boy. After what has happened this weekend I am questioning both those things.

We go to Rachel crying in the Have Not Room. I Fast Forward that. Sorry. Just not going to do it anymore. I mute it when I am on the feeds. Not going to watch it on the show. I play when I see Porsche go in there to comfort her. Rachel thanks her for being her friend. Jordan eventually comes in, as does Jeff, but I FF. When I play again Jeff is all ego and stating as fact that no matter which of them goes out, they are coming back in. I am so annoyed that Julie gave them any kind of a hint to the twist. and I am even more annoyed that Jeff knows the producers are among his Claymates and cater to him. I FF again.

Kalia gets her HoH room. I FF that too. Man. I really don’t like this season, do I? Just no point in covering that at all.

Daniele gave Kalia advice on how to talk to people as they are all going to come up to Hoh and offer her things to be safe. Daniele tells her to just listen and don’t say too much. Rachel comes in.

1st Rachel moans about Brendon for awhile. Again, I FF. Daniele leaves so I play again. Rachel tells her how she respects her now as a player because she won HoH and almost won last week. She thinks Kalia worked hard for this and if she doesn’t Nominate Rachel then Rachel won’t put her up next week. She claims she 100% respects her now that she’s won a competition. Kalia told her she has no idea what she’s going to do. Kalia tells us that she is tempted to try to work with Rachel because no one would expect it but it’s like quick sand because Rachel can’t be trusted. Once Rachel leaves Kalia says that humble pie tastes good.

We got a segment on Shelly grilling Kalia. Shelly always shoots twenty questions to people about their lives. This time she was asking if Kalia’s parents are wealthy. Kalia said she was raised being told she could have whatever she wanted. Then Shelly asked if she has been discriminated against and Kalia said black women are especially discriminated against and she hates the whole thing when people say you talk well. Shelly tells us that she got to see a little into Kalia’s soul and her struggles.

Then a segment on Adam doing a strip tease as he got to take off the elf costume. I think me typing up that sentence took longer than the segment.

Ohmygod is this season lame. Now we see another commando Shelly as she crawls across the yard to scare Kalia napping in the hammock. Have I ever said this season sucks? because it totally does.

Kalia tells Daniele she is really nervous because one of Jeff/ Rachel will stay. She is going to tell Jeff he isn’t the target and she just wanted someone strong to play for PoV so Rachel doesn’t win it. She also wants to play the emotional card and say she is trying to prove her word to him. What? I will never get this stuff. Everyone plays personally. If you put them up, they are after you. It’s human nature. So don’t put people up that you aren’t willing to risk and always know you made that enemy. I don’t give a sh*t what deals you make or what children you swear it on. That person is after you. Period. End of story. Get a clue and move on. Daniele said that Kalia wants Jeff to think she [Kalia] is on his side if he stays.

Time to play for Have or Have Not. They didn’t really show you, but when the bandanas were on the table to pick teams, Rachel snatched up all the blue to make sure she was on a team with her buddies. So the teams were Daniele – Lawon – Porsche – Adam against Jefdan – Shelly – Rachel. It was that challenge where there was a board that listed a bunch of different ingredients. Two people would compete and put three things in a blender. The opponent has to drink it and then name the three items. If it’s a tie they have to do a chug off.

Jeff put Gorgonzola cheese, scrambled eggs and applesauce in his. Lawon did potato chips, corned beef hash and cream corn. Jeff correctly guessed cream corn. Lawon got spray cheese wrong. Jeff was right again on corn beef hash. Lawon got scrambled eggs. Jeff got spray cheese wrong and Lawon was right with Gorgonzola. So they were tied and had to chug off. Jeff won.

Shelly did beets, dill pickles and jalapenos. Porsche did carrots, yams and onions. She said she didn’t know what an onion tastes like. Huh? Is she for real? Porsche was 1st and said horseradish. Wrong. Shelly got carrots right. Porsche was right with beets. Shelly was wrong on jalapenos. Porsche was right on dill pickles. Jeff cheats and tells Shelly canned yams. Shelly ended up not listening to cheater and says olives so lost the round. This of course gets people mad at her for not listening to King Jeff. Jordan said it was like she didn’t care.

Daniele did sauerkraut, horseradish and applesauce. Jordan did cream corn, spray cheese and liverwurst. Jordan got horseradish right. Daniele guessed corn beef hash and was wrong. Jordan got dill pickles wrong. Daniele got liverwurst. Jordan was wrong on cream corn and Daniele on hot dogs. So it’s a chug off. Jordan gagged and Daniele won. So this means Shelly, Jefdan and Rachel are Have Nots for the week. Wah Wah. Way to go Rachel. You stacked the deck with all your extra cool players and you lost to a bunch of floaters.

Jordan cries about losing it for her team. Then to make it worse they are given coconuts and catfish as their added food. Jordan doesn’t like fish and doesn’t know if you eat or drink coconuts. Jordan rants to Jeff that Porsche hasn’t done sh*t in the game and gets to sit back and do nothing. She said Lawon does nothing too. Everyone just sways in the middle while him and Rachel get picked off. She whines to us that she and Jeff have been targets every week. Ummm. No you haven’t. You had power for the 1st 3, honey. YOU got to sit back and do nothing. Was never in any danger of going until last week. But that’s a nice try. Continue on with your pity party. Let’s feel sorry for the previous winner.

Kalia tells us she thinks she knows Shelly personally and wants to trust her. Kalia asked Shelly to go up to HoH. Kalia tells her that this stays between us. This is something I don’t get. Everything people tells Shelly, she tells other people. The original person finds out this is going around, and Shelly doesn’t get the blame. It’s just crazy to me that people aren’t on to Shelly. Or even when they say they know something, they just dismiss it. The only one that completely has her number is Porsche and no one listens to her. Kalia said she knows she and Daniele can’t win HoH each week and she would love for Shelly to be with them. Shelly said she would not put up Daniele or Kalia next week and wants to know if she and Daniele would go to the end with her. Shelly tells us she has no intention of doing that because she’s a Claymate and wants to go with Jefdan. Now she didn’t say the Claymate part but that’s what she means. Shelly tells us she just needs to work the other side just in case. Kalia was totally down about a Final Three with her.

Time for Jefdan to yell at Kalia and try to bully their way to get what they want. Kalia tells them they are not her target but she needs someone to play PoV that can beat Rachel and makes she sure goes so putting Jeff up is the only way to insure he plays. This enrages Princess Jordan show said someone will come back and then she will have 2 strong players after her. She will put a target on her back. She whined that they [meaning the other side of the house] don’t care that Rachel will win PoV and send Jeff home. Gee, you think? Why should the other side care if Jeff goes home? Just like if they had won HoH and put up Daniele and Kalia and Daniele won HoH and Kalia left they wouldn’t feel bad. That’s how the game goes. You get out the people not on your side. It’s pretty simple. You would think a former winner would know that but since Jordan didn’t win by her gameplay she doesn’t know these things. So Jordan just rants on and on about how there is dead weight in the house they should get out. I love how the Vets always like to play this floater bullsh*t but it’s only when they don’t have power. Why don’t you get out the floaters? Yeah, because they are on your side when you have power. Duh. You need their votes. Jordan leaves in a huff.

So now it’s Jeff’s turn to be the prick we all know he is. He said she has to know if Rachel gets off the block he is going home. Kalia said it’s possible but she doesn’t think it will happen. Jeff said when he comes back she will be his number one target. Kalia said she heard she was already his target. Jeff gets louder claiming she wasn’t and doesn’t know where she heard it from. and then goes on and on about the floater bullsh*t and then he tries saying that Kalia has Daniele in her ear and there are no pics of Daniele up there. He said it’s not true because Floaters are his target. Um, then he is targeting Shelly? No? Adam? No? He targets Daniele. A total non-floater. But alrighty then. Continue on with your bad self Big Jeffy. He is going on and on that Kalia was not his target. [She was.] and that she just put a target on her back. He said she can put Jordan up but she will never go home and he is 100% that he will come back and get her. I almost want to do this show just so people can see you don’t let bullies talk to you like that. I would so tell Jeffy to get f*cked. I know it’s hard for him to do since he refuses to live in the same state as Jordan but whatever. It’s a game, Douche! Dial it back a notch. Jebus.

Kalia tells us Jeff did rattle her and worries she may dig her own grave. Ugh. IT’S THE GAME! You have to put two, sometimes three people up. Those people are coming after you. Did I say that already? Yeah. Ugh. I hate this season. I really do.

So here we go with the confessionals before the obvious nominations. Jeff feels confident he is going up and says he is ready to take his medicine. I have no idea what that even meant. Jordan is frustrated because she is always a target and thinks they others are hypnotized to follow Daniele. I again don’t know what that means. The house is following Jefdan, not Daniele. and Daniele has been in danger just as much as they have. Jordan was safe the whole 3 weeks Daniele was.

Rachel continued with the Daniele slams and said that Kalia was a puppet to Daniele’s puppermaster and she has started a war and Kalia can barely compete with Rachel. That’s funny because Kalia just kicked her ass in the last HoH.

As they sit down for the ceremony, Rachel is playing the catty girl game and sits close to Daniele so she’s touching her and then is over the top nice and asked her how she’s doing. Daniele moved over on the bench so Rachel moved closer so she was once again touching her. Daniele asked BB if this was necessary.

The keys come out and Adam’s was 1st as Kalia wished him a Happy Birthday. Porsche and Daniele’s were the next two. Jordan was next and instead of saying the usual “Thank you” that everyone says, Jordan had to bitch about her key should be left out because she will just go up once Jeff or Rachel come down. Poor sport. You know if Daniele did that people would bitch about it forever. But since Jordan did it, you go girl! Lawon and Shelly were the last 2 keys so Jeff and Rachel are nominated.

Kalia said last week was hell due to cattiness and talking behind backs but the people who are in the pictures that people point at are the ones that told her to make the right decision for her and she has made her own decision.

After the ceremony Rachel continued with her cattiness and asked how Daniele was doing. Daniele said she is an idiot. Rachel asked if she wanted to talk. Daniele said she doesn’t want to be anywhere around her. Daniele tells us Rachel is a trainwreck and this would be the perfect time to get her out but she would have no problem if Jeff was the one to go.

Jeff tells us that Kalia made the wrong move due to the twist. You know. because the game is always fixed for Jeff. He said if he’s not the target, then why put him up. Hmm. Why oh why could that be? Maybe because you have to put two people up and one isn’t your target? I know Jeffy doesn’t know how to play this game but that should be common sense for such a player as himself. He rants on saying now she’s gotten 2 players mad. Like they weren’t mad before. and guess who’s coming for you? Maybe the same people that were after her the last two weeks but there big, bad playing skills didn’t win them HoH?

Kalia tells us that Jeff yelling at her is not a way to get her not to nominate him.

Finally we come to Rachel saying she will fight like tooth and nail to get her and she will be back since she’s also convinced if it’s her that goes, she gets to come right back in.

Tags: Big Brother Episode Recaps